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EST. May 2000 (AD)




Does He Like You? Is He Worth Pursuing?

Sharon Grehan-Howes

Rate your current romantic prospects and see what guy you should set your cap for!


At Work:

You are standing by the water cooler. You say you've got great tickets to see (insert cool movie name here.)

Does he say:

Bachelor A That sounds great, what time would you like me to pick you up?

Bachelor B Oh.

Bachelor C Do you know where they keep the spare cups?

You have both been working late. You suggest that you go out for a drink

Does he say:

Bachelor A I know a terrific place right round the corner.

Bachelor B Yeah, right.

Bachelor C No, I like to have fun when I drink.

While discussing a report you lean over him and your arm accidentally brushes his.

Does he say:

Bachelor A Your skin is like velvet.

Bachelor B You can take this back to your office if you want.

Bachelor C Nothing, and brings out a moist toilette.

At the Clubs

Your favourite song comes on and you mention it to the guy standing next to you.

Does he say

Bachelor A Yeah, me too! Would you like to dance?

Bachelor B If you're going to dance, can I have your seat?

Bachelor C Nothing and feigns sleep.

You decide to go for broke and ask a guy if you can buy him a drink

Does he say:

Bachelor A Thank you. May I reciprocate?

Bachelor B Thanks!... I'm a bit hungry too...

Bachelor C Thanks, but I'd rather have the cash.

On a Blind Date

When you first meet arrive at his place

Does he say

Bachelor A Wow, a woman right in my own home!

Bachelor B Did anyone see you come in?

Bachelor C I'm going to kill Sid for this.

You have a wonderful time. Just before the date ends you ask him if he'd like to do it again

Does he say

Bachelor A Sure, I'm free right through to 2017!

Bachelor B What, you mean with you?

Bachelor C No I'm not going to date anymore. Ever.


Bachelor A is extremely interested in you which should make you view him with suspicion. Groucho Marx said it best with: " I don't care to belong to a club that accepts people like me as members ."

He is completely negating that voice in your head that tells you you are unlovable and not worthy of a kind decent man. How dare he? Honesty and sincerity are definite turn-offs. If he starts to snub you he may become more interesting but until then, you need more of a challenge.

Bachelor B He isn't interested in you but he isn't worth fighting for as he will probably cave after a while and begin to love you. As with Bachelor A You will lose the thrill of the chase and the exhilaration of conquest and that's not what love is all about.

Bachelor C is not the least bit interested in you so better set your cap and start stalking! He will provide you, your family and friends with hours and hours of entertainment in the heartbreaking weeks and months ahead.

Your friends will get to practice their skills of analysis as every look of his is scrutinized and every sentence uttered is pulled apart for hidden meaning. They will wisely tell you there is a thin line between love and hate and you will feel that it's Scarlett and Rhett all over again! Life with Bachelor C will be the most exciting as you will have to fight for him and once you'll have years and years of excitement as you try to change him.

Ahhhhh Romance!



DISCLAIMER: This is a parody of women's magazines so don't come crying to us if you starved to death on one of our diets or you took out your liver by mistake. Unless otherwise noted all material © 2000 - 2018 Sharon Grehan-Howes ( aka Sharon Jeffcock ) Happy Woman Magazine All Rights Reserved