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I Finally Said No

One woman's courageous journey to self-aggrandizement and unadulterated self-love.

By Meredith Litt

I was twenty-eight years old when "it" happened. I'd tell you what "it" was, but if I don't save it for the anti-climactic end of my article, I'll have to eliminate about a thousand words of my masterfully written text.

I was married to the love of my life and had just landed a job as the head of the marketing department for a new laxative containing ephedrine (to promote fast, all-natural weight loss). My job was everything to me; I lived, breathed, and slept EpheLax. It was so fulfilling for me to be a wife and a career woman at such a young age; it's an accomplishment that few women have achieved, and I felt like a true heroine for females everywhere. In fact, I knew I was.

The problem was that John, my husband, disagreed wholeheartedly. As I pounded out marketing proposals on my laptop until the early morning hours, he took on a selfishness that made him almost unrecognizable to me. He began to ask questions like: "Honey, when are you going to get off the computer so that we can spend some time together?" and "I miss you. Please take some time off of work for our one-year anniversary." To be frank, I knew then that our marriage was doomed to fail. How could I stay married to a man who didn't respect my career and, moreover, my irreplaceable contribution to womankind?

One day, as I arrived home from a twelve-hour day in meetings for a new ad campaign, John looked at me with sad eyes and offered one final plea: "It's been months since you've so much as kissed me. Please, take the weekend off so that I can show you how much I love you."

I was furious. How could he be so selfish? I was about to launch a campaign for EpheLax that would innovate laxative advertisement as the world knew it and make it possible for overweight women everywhere to lose weight and stay regular simultaneously. My efforts were not to be undermined by ridiculous declarations of love and insensitive requests for time off. Looking at him as tears filled his eyes, I wondered how I could have married a man so fixated on himself.

It was that day that I finally did it. That word, which had been simmering within my psyche for years, finally effervesced to the surface. That day, I told John, "No." I felt empowered as I continued with a request for a divorce, having finally realized that he could never fulfill my needs.

Ladies, I know that you all suffer from moments of weakness. Your love for your partners may inspire temporary lapses in logic, causing you to prioritize your spouse first and yourself last. Never fall into this trap like I did. Empower yourself. Take the first step, and never look back. It's not about who gets hurt along the way, but, ultimately, about satisfying your own needs. If I can do it, anyone can.

© 2004 Meredith Litt

ABOUT THE AUTHOR

Meredith Litt recently graduated from Quinnipiac University with a bachelor's degree in English and sociology minor. She works in retail management and freelances as a writer.

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