Est. 2000 (A.D.)

Are you Healthy?

Take Our Quiz!

 

How would you rate your health compared to others the same age?

 

Excellent

Fair

Who are the others?

I put aside time to exercise:

 

3-5 times a week

2-3 times a week

1-3 times maybe next week

I find that I am short of breath after:

 

10 minutes of rigorous exercise

5 minutes of rigorous exercise

a nap

I would like to lose:

 

5-10 pounds

10- 50 pounds

Not sure, can't see the scale.

What is your blood pressure?:

 

Lower than 90/65

Between 90/65 to 120/81

My what?

What is your heart rate?

 

Lower than 76 beats per minutes less than thirty minutes of exercise.

Higher that 91 beats per minute less than 30 minutes of exercise.

Don't know, but I think it's great because I can feel it in my temples all the time.

Have you ever had a heart attack?:

 

Yes

No

Yes, but less than 3-5 times a week

Have you ever had a stroke?:

 

Yes

No

Is that what that was?

Do you smoke?:

 

Nonsmoker

Ex-smoker

Not sure.

How many times a week do you eat breakfast?:

 

More than five times a week

3-5 times a week

3-5 times per day

How many alcoholic beverages do you drink per day?:

 

None

1/2 to 1 alcoholic beverage per day.

Depends on who's buying.

Scoring:

 

If you picked number 1 for three or more, your obsession with every little function of your body is extremely boring. In a phrase-get over yourself. You will probably live longer but who cares because no one will want to be around you. (See article The Elderly)

 

If you picked number 2 to three or more, you are probably pretty healthy but be careful as you are in danger of falling into category one. Lighten up, order some cheese fries and watch some TV.

 

If you picked number 3 to any of the above and are still alive, congrats. You probably don't have much longer to live so you might as well enjoy it while you can. Of all three categories you would more than likely be the most fun to be around and it's unlikely you would ever become a burden on society.

 

©2001 Sharon Grehan www.happywomanmagazine.com

 

 

 

DISCLAIMER: This is a parody of women's magazines so don't come crying to us if you starved to death on one of our diets or you took out your liver by mistake. Unless otherwise noted all material © 2000 - 2022 Sharon Grehan-Howes ( aka Sharon Jeffcock ) Happy Woman Magazine All Rights Reserved