PUBLISHED MONTHLY
EST. May 2000 (AD)

 
 

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A DAY IN THE LIFE: MARTHA STEWART

Our intrepid celebrity interviewer Libby Zimmerman was not able to snag an interview with this homemaker extraordinaire but the resourceful Libby was able to gain entry to Martha's lair,a sumptuous 153 acre estate, under the guise of settling a personal injury suit.

Once inside Martha's home Libby "borrowed" a page from Martha's day timer and a ramekin.

Martha Stewart: A Day In The Life

4:00 Wake up, dress (note to self: buy more blue shirts).

4:10 Spray bangs.

4:45 Bang pots to wake up roosters.

5:00 Workout. Treadmill, 3 mile run, 350 sit ups 212 push-ups.

5:12 Mow 153 acres with power mower, fix transmission.

7:00 Breakfast: hover over cook as she prepares truffle omelet. Criticize.

7:30 Crank call ex husband.

8:00 Hold stopwatch to ensure timely arrival of film crew.

8:30 Tape show. Prepare Beef Wellington with Ma, Walnut Blue Cheese Coins and Pink Heart tuile cookies.

Rewire a lamp create Fortuny inspired lace tablecloth and build under the bed storage box.

12:00 Tell mother that she won't work in this town again.

12:30 Lunch: Bologna sandwich.

12:45 Call ex and hang up.

12:48 Call daughter and tell her about bobby pin in the Louis XVI night table. Ask if it belongs to her.

13:00 Drive to Omnimedia while recording editor's note detour past ex's house.

14:45 Say no to every proposal submitted by board members. Rephrase their ideas as own.

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